Monthly Archives : December 2012

xfactor ramasiX Factor – intre famiile concurentilor

X Factor – intre famiile concurentilor

aseara intr-una din pauzele publicitare din gala X Factor, Dan Pandrea m-a intrebat cine cred ca intra la duel.

mai avea Iulia de cintat, dar ea are o voce minunata si o vad in finala ( o vad de fapt o mare artista daca va invata sa-si arate vulerabilitatile, fragilitatea; oamenii se sperie de cei perfecti si empatizeaza cu cei vulnerabili).

i-am raspuns lui Dan cu singe rece: “Tudor Todut si, de dragul show-ului, as vrea un duel intre Red si Nordix. oricum unul dintre grupuri iese in seara asta sigur, asa ca daca sunt amindoua la duel avem si suspence.”

*

imi place Todut (am mai scris despre asta)- dintre cei din casa, era si este unul dintre cei mai curati la suflet, un om bun in esenta lui; are o voce minunata, dar e prea tinar si n-a trait inca suficient de mult ca sa poata transmite ceea ce spun versurile cintecelor.

fetele de la Red sunt si ele cu mult bun simt (Elena – cu efortul ei de a slabi si cu lupta ei de a infrunta opinia publica pentru ca nu sunt in standardele 90-60-90 – e preferata mea); la fel aia micii de la Nordix (care au venit, asa cum au si spus, sa invete; Flavia de acum 2 saptamini spunea ca nu o sa-i para rau daca iese pentru ca ea a invatat mult din aceasta experienta si stie ca a cistigat ceva), dar e un show de televiziune si toti o sa iasa rind pe rind.

iar eu, simtindu-ma un mic Dumnezeu, cind am fost intrebata, m-am jucat cu destinele lor.

e bine insa ca sunt mii de voturi, nu doar parerea unui singur om:)

***

toata aroganta mea a disparut pina la finalul perioadei de votare. a fost un moment in spectacol in care au aparut toate familiile concurentilor pe scena si apoi rudele au venit in sala. in spatele meu s-au asezat parintii si fratii Flaviei (are o sora super super dragalasa), in dreapta pe treptele de linga gradena in care stateam, parintii lui Tudor din Nordix. iar in rindul I in raza mea vizuala, in gradena paralela, fratele lui Todut cu parintii.

cit s-au anuntat cei salvati, am auzit cele mai multe oftaturi pe minut. simteam cum se roaga parintii din jurul meu. fratele lui Todut, un pusti de maximum 12 ani, stringea pumnii si-avea falcile inclestate. sora Flaviei isi impleticise degetele (ca atunci cind juri sa spui adevarul) si le stringea asa de tare incit erau vinetii.

brusc nu mi-am mai dorit sa plece nimeni. mi-a parut rau pentru aroganta mea de a face asa de usor presupuneri asupra vietilor unor copii.

***

cind au ramas trei concurenti pe scena (Udila, Nordix si Todut), tatal lui Tudor Todut a facut semnul de ok, un degetul mare ridicat in sus, catre fiul lui. “te sustin orice ar fi”, spus simplu, barbateste.

ala micu a inceput sa plinga si-a plins in hohote si cind a fost eliminat Todut, si toata pauza publicitara de dupa. se ineca de plins. plingea cu fiecare bucatica din corpul lui.

era acolo dragostea pentru frate mai presus de orice dorinta de cistig. iar mama incerca din greu sa-l linisteasca.

cind au ramas pe scena Udila si Nordix, mama celuilalt Tudor (calutul blond si naravas din Nordix) a exclamat “n-au nicio sansa cu Udila” si-a recunoscut cu maxima eleganta ca isi facusera planul ca atunci cind ies Nordix, ei sa voteze cu Udila. evident nu si-au imaginat ca lucrurile se vor aseza asa incit sa fie chiar in aceasta formula la duel.

restul e istorie pe care ati vazut-o la tv.

***
din gala de aseara, pastrez trei imagini/ senzatii:

rusinea mea ca m-am jucat – chiar si cu gindul – cu destinele unor copii.

lacrimile in siroaie ale fratelui lui Tudor Todut si cum, cind in sfirsit s-a linistit, a aplaudat fiecare dintre duelisti, tinind ritmul melodiilor lor (un fel de show must go on, intr-o versiune a inocentei unui copil)

si o secventa pe care n-ati vazut-o, desi s-a petrecut pe scena. era o pauza publicitara.

cind au terminat de cintat Parazitii, Chello s-a asezat in stinga scenei linga concurentii lui pentru ca urmau sa fie anuntate rezultatele voturilor. publicul era inca in picioare, fremata dupa prestatia lor. (sala a fost cea mai animata dintre toate prestatiile pe care le-am vazut la X Factor si-a fost o energie foarte buna)

Chello simtea reactia salii si isi exprima bucuria fara vorbe: sarea pe calciie ca un copil, cu pumnii strinsi pe linga corp si ridea cu ochii. un minut mai tirziu, cind adrenalina s-a mai dus, iar regizorul de platou incepea numaratoarea inversa pentru intrarea in live, Cheloo era inapoi “in personaj” cu fata aspra si exclama: “primul care o sa fie eliminat am sa fiu eu.”

***

recunosc ca m-am gindit ca e neincrederea lui in replica aia, e forma de autoaparare pentru orice remarca ar fi fost sa vina, dar la fel de onest recunosc ca – pentru ca tocmai ce primisem o lectie de la parintii celor de pe scena – mi-am spus imediat: “cine sunt eu sa judec asta?”

asa ca e mai bine sa descriu si sa va las pe fiecare sa intelegeti dupa cum simtiti.

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mentaoamenii-s ca florile

oamenii-s ca florile

oamenii-s ca florile… si nu ma refer la frumusetea lor.

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am o gradina aromatica – busuioc, ardei iuti, menta, cimbru etc – care traieste dupa legile ei. mama Anei Onisei mi-a pregatit-o si aranjat-o si dupa o saptamina de la sosirea acasa, menta s-a uscat cu totul. o vreme am lasat crengutele lungi de menta sa atirne din ghivecul de la geam, dupa care resemnata, le-am taiat.

m-am gindit ca nu s-a prins radacina si, asta e, au murit. am sa caut alte plante si am sa le pun.

de citeva zile insa intre butucii de la radacina uscata au inceput sa apara muguri semn ca menta mea prinde din nou viata.

astazi dimineata cind am inspectat cit a mai crescut mi-am dat seama ca daca n-as fi tuns uscaturile probabil ca n-ar mai fi rasarit nimic in loc, pentru ca n-ar fi avut lumina.

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asa ca m-am gindit ca si oamenii sunt ca florile: cind inlatura uscaturile si fac loc pentru lumina, incep sa infloreasca. sa fie oameni.

ceea ce imi doresc si mie, si voua:)

stiu ca am mai scris cindva despre cum florile sunt ca iubirile (le uzi ce le uzi si cum ai uitat sa le ingrijesti, hopaaa, mor) si imi dau seama ca gradinaritul (am 4 ghivece toate, sa fiu precisa; au murit aproape toate din articolul ala cu iubirile:)) ) inspira la filosofie:)

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1.despre cum ii conducem pe altii

despre cum ii conducem pe altii

din cind in cind, citesc carti de psihologie aplicata. ma ajuta la interviuri pentru ca pot ghici mai mult din personajul pe care-l am in fata dincolo de cuvintele pe care le rosteste.

tocmai am citit asta.

Anxietatea poate fi folosita ca o arma cu care sa conduci o alta persoana. Daca un copil sau un adult sufera de anxietate, putem ghici ca exista o alta persoana care il sprijina.

Era odata un cuplu care insista ca gindeste liber.Astfel de oameni cred ca fiecare poate face orice vrea in casnicie, atit timp cit fiecare ii spune celuilalt ce se intimpla. Drept urmare sotul a avut citeva aventuri si i-a spus sotiei totul despre ele. Ea parea perfect multumita. Dar mai tirziu a inceput sa sufere de anxietate. Nu mai voia sa iasa din casa. Trebuia ca sotul ei sa o insoteasca mereu.

Putem vedea aici cum si-a folosit fobia sau anxietatea ca sa modifice acest aspect al relatiei lor.

Alfred Adler.

*

data viitoare cind sunteti anxiosi ginditi-va, onesti doar voi cu voi, ce ceva va deranjeaza de fapt.

stiu e luni, dar asa de mult mi-a plact fragmentul asta citit cind am deschis cartea la nimereala, mai ales ca se potriveste cu discutii pe care le-am avut ieri despre cum se schimba comportamentul oamenilor cind ii scoti din zona de confort, incit n-am rezistat sa nu-l public.

macar sa pun o foto frumoasa sa ma mai scot putin:)

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shame-michael-fassbenderdependenta de sex

dependenta de sex

am vazut Shame zilele trecute, un film care este despre dependenta de sex; am scris despre asta aici.
astazi, in rutina duminicala de a citi presa straina, mi-a atras atentia un titlu: Sex Addiction – The truth about a modern phenomenon.

daca nu aveti timp sa cititi intregul articol, iata citeva fragmente care spun multe.

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No one understands what the rise in sex addiction is entirely about but internet porn, Ms Hall says, has got to be part of it. “Porn is like the gateway drug. Just as with cannabis and cocaine, many people will use the gateway drug and never become addicted; but others most definitely will. And unlike drugs or alcohol, users don’t even realise they’re dealing with something that might prove to be addictive.”

The easy availability of porn gives people in high-stress jobs a way of dealing with their pressurised lifestyle. “We’re seeing more soldiers who’ve done tours in Afghanistan and have used internet porn as a means of escape,” Ms Hall says. “And as with alcohol, using porn to soothe the pressures of life isn’t bad in itself – unless and until it becomes addictive, and is the only way you can escape from your problems.”

In researching her book, Ms Hall surveyed 350 people who described themselves as addicted to sex, 25 per cent of whom were women. “The proportion of women addicts surprised me,” she says. “And what surprised me even more was the number who are using porn: 90 per cent of the men I surveyed, and 74 per cent of the women, said they were heavy porn-users. We have this idea that women are into relationship sex while men are more visually stimulated, so this seemed to fly in the face of that.”

(…)

For sex addicts, the nature of their addiction gives them additional problems. “If I was an alcoholic or a drug addict, people would be sympathetic and would want to help,” David says. “But with sex addiction it’s completely different; people moralise it, they can’t possibly deal with it. I couldn’t possibly tell anyone I know about my addiction, so it’s a very lonely thing to deal with – and of course as for all addicts, the first step to overcoming it is admitting it’s going on.

***

Comentariile obscene nu vor fi aprobate. Nu va osteniti sa le scrieti 🙂

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patrick stewarddespre violenta in familie cu Sir Patrick Steward

despre violenta in familie cu Sir Patrick Steward

As a child, Sir Patrick Stewart learned to love the songs of Irish tenors. If his father, Alf, came home singing “The Mountains of Mourne” or his favourite, “I’ll take you home again, Kathleen”, then his mother, Gladys, was safe. The actor, now 72, and his older brother, Trevor, lived in terror of military tunes. “We would lie awake in what was really no more than a partitioned-off corner of my parents’ bedroom, waiting for him to come back. Nobody went to sleep. We would listen as he came into the yard. If he was singing army songs, that was bad news. Then he would find fault with something and then the conflict would escalate.

“Calling the police was not an easy thing to do in the 1940s, so someone had to go to the phone box, which was at least 500 yards from our front door, and make a 999 call. Often the call was not made.” When it was, the police would come, the ambulance service and doctor would come to the family home in Mirfield, West Yorkshire. “My mother would be lying on the floor, bleeding,” says Stewart.

“The kinds of things said were unbelievable. A policeman once said, ‘it takes two to make an argument’, or, ‘well, she must have done something to upset him’. Which is a way of saying he must have been justified to be violent, and we know there is no justification for being violent. None whatsoever.”

Often Stewart was forced to step in to defend his mother from his father’s explosive rage. “I became an expert at judging the heat of an argument,” he says. “As the temperature rose I would get out of bed and on to the landing, and, if it rose further, I would go down the stairs, sitting on the stone steps so as to be as close as possible to the door if something bad happened. If the escalation continued I could try to intervene.

“Now, it is really sad when a child becomes an expert on those kind of issues. But I was and I knew exactly the moment when I would throw the door open and rush in and say ‘Stop!’ or literally put my body between them.”

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dintr-un interviu (socant pentru mine) din the independent

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OnteachingJournalism1o poveste cu multe intelesuri

o poveste cu multe intelesuri

One summer Sunday I was sitting on the riverbank thinking of a story I was writing. A lifetime of scribbled ideas and abandoned projects had begun to take the form of a collection, and I was in a creative fervor.

Suddenly I felt the hairs on the back of my neck prickle. Turning, I saw him standing above me, glaring. He had been laboring for hours, as was his wont. He had mowed the lawn, weeded the garden and painted the porch and for all I knew plowed the back 40. He was fed up with me, sitting there doing nothing. I was ashamed.

It wasn’t until later, after I had swept the house and washed the dishes and cleaned the fridge and we were on our way back to the city, that I realized the story I had been thinking about had faded away. I tried to summon the characters and reimagine the setting, to stoke the urgency I’d felt on the riverbank, but the curtain had dropped; the stage was dark and empty.

I looked at my husband driving, his face set in stern concentration, and saw how pleased he was with what he had accomplished over the weekend. “Listen,” I said, “when you see me sitting there staring off into the distance doing nothing, I’m busy.”

He smiled and squeezed my thigh. After a moment, he said, “I want to clean out the pachysandra around the barn next week.”

*

dintr-o poveste reala si cu multe intelesuri publicata astazi in New York Times

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wachowskio lectie despre sa nu te dai batut(a)

o lectie despre sa nu te dai batut(a)

ii stiti pe fratii Wachowski, cei care au schimbat cinematografia cu Matrix. ati crede ca le e usor si ca pot avea orice pe lumea asta pentru proiectele lor.

data viitoare cind credeti ca nu va iese ceva pentru ca voi sunteti cei mai ghinionisti din lume, pentru ca sunteti mici si necunoscuti, amintiti-va ceea ce veti citi mai jos.

si dupa ce cititi, duceti-va sa vedeti filmul pentru care au muncit atit, Cloud Atlas.

ceea ce veti citi mai jos e o lectie buna despre daca ai incredere in ceea ce faci, daca faci cu pasiune si inteligenta , ai sa gasesti o cale sa-ti duci visul la capat. pentru ca nimanui nu-i e usor, doar ca unii persevereaza mai mult decit altii.

AVC: You spent years trying to get Cloud Atlas funded, while working on other projects. How do you maintain excitement for one project over such a long period, especially while working on other films?

AW: Well it’s extremely difficult.

LW: There’s three of us. That helps.

AW: We’re a collective. Whenever somebody’s down—or in this case, often two people were down, and the third always seemed to yell at us to keep going, “Get on your feet!” Sometimes we would all be down. There was this one period where we ended up saying, “Okay, this probably isn’t going to happen. But why don’t we read the script one more time. If there is any doubt in our minds, we’ll let it go.” And we all separately read the script, and we all separately had this elation from reading, and we were like, “Okay, we ought to give this one more chance.”

LW: The more we worked on it, the more intensely we loved it. To the point where there was this feeling, even after three years, that no matter what happened, somehow we were going to get this movie made. There would be huge, depressing setbacks and challenges where [financial backers] would say, “I’m in,” and then a month later, they would go, “I’m out.” And we’d say, “You can’t, we have a contract,” and they would say, “Sue us.” I mean, like, that kind of collapse.

AW: And this happened all the way up until the moment the actors were supposed to fly out to Berlin to start costuming.

LW: We were supposed to deposit money in their accounts, and we didn’t have it, because the bank wouldn’t close the loan, because suddenly we had—

AW: We had a financing gap with one of our investors, I think in Spain. Like, they went bankrupt. So we ended up putting our own money in.

LW: We had to put the houses up to bridge the gap. And we didn’t even—it wasn’t even a long discussion. It was instantaneous. We were going to make the movie. It was too close, it was too important, and really, we were too much in love with it. We would do anything for this movie.

AVC: What percentage of the budget did you end up having to put up yourself?

LW: Well, we waived all our fees—

AW: It’s complicated, because we have our companies that have put money into it, and then we also had to put money in personally.

LW: All over, we’re probably well over 10 percent of the budget.

AW: Close to 7 million bucks or something like that.

AVC: Did you have similar problems with the actors, as the financing years went on, where people agreed to be in it and then dropped out?

LW: Well, there were some actors who were a little terrified of the material and the idea of playing six parts. And a couple people chickened out. But in general, the actors who were committed were as ferociously and fearlessly committed as we were. They flew—even though their agents called them and said, “They don’t have the money, the money’s not closed”—

AW: Advising them not to fly, not to get on the plane—

LW: Every single time, Tom Hanks was the first who said, “I’m getting on the plane.” And then once he said he was getting on the plane, basically everyone said, “Well, Tom’s on the plane, we’re on the plane.” And so everyone flew [to Berlin to begin the film]. It was like this giant leap of faith. From all over the globe.

intregul interviu aici

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shame-michael-fassbenderShame- Fassbender

Shame- Fassbender

am o teorie ca fiecare lucru vine la vremea lui si tocmai mi s-a mai demonstrat asta.

aveam filmul Shame de mai bine de o jumatate de an si abia aseara m-am hotarit sa-l vad. ( din aceeasi categorie, “A Separation” nu pot inca sa-l vad, nu am o explicatie de ce, dar nu mi-am facut curaj pentru intilnirea cu el)

stiam subiectul, stiam ca are mult sex (mentionez asta ca poate va conving sa-l vedeti), stiam distributia, stiam si ca e genial; ce nu stiam este ca daca inlocui dependenta de sex a personajului principal cu orice dependenta care sa vina si cu o parte de rusine/ sa ceara intimitate, nu se schimba nimic din puterea mesajului.

filmul asta e despre cum dorintele ne modeleaza ca oameni, ne transforma.

de aseara cred ca Fassbender e versiunea mai tinara a lui Daniel Day Lewis in tehnica actoriceasca si in puterea de a se pierde in personaj. uitati-va la cit de dramatice sunt transformarile de la un personaj la altul si ce tehnica impecabila are. o puteti vedea si in cele citeva secunde in care plinge in scena asta.

e una dintre cele mai frumoase interpretari ale cintecului New Yoork, New York. niciodata n-am inteles mai bine ca acum mesajul acestui cintec care parea vesel, dar nu e.

iar carrey mulligan e geniala.

“The scene where Brandon hears his sister sing in the restaurant was shot in real time. James Badge Dale and Michael Fassbender had never heard Carey Mulligan sing before so their reactions were real. The scene was shot at 3 in the morning with cameras focused on all 3 performers at the same time”

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