Am citit o carte despre cum functioneaza creierul si despre cum putem, intelegandu-i mecanismele, sa-l folosim la capacitatea lui optima (nu maxima) pentru fericirea noastra.
Cartea se numeste My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist’s Personal Journey, si e scrisa de un medic neurolog care a avut un atac cerebral – Jill Bolte Taylor, o puteti gasi aici in varianta Kindle, iar in print exista si in romaneste la editura Curtea Veche.
Eu am citit-o in versiunea electronica in engleza pentru ca am ajuns la ea via o alta carte (Impacarea cu noi insine – Pema Chodron) si n-am avut rabdare sa o comand / sau sa merg la librarie sa o cumpar in romaneste.
Pema Chodron povesteste cum, in cartea sa, Jill Bolte Taylor explica mecanismul psihologic care sta la baza emotiei: o emotie precum furia, care este o reactie mecanica, dureaza doar 90 de secunde din clipa in care s-a declansat pana isi incheie parcursul. Un minut si jumatate. Cand dureaza mai mult, si de obicei dureaza mai mult, este pentru ca noi am ales sa o reactivam. Sa o alimentam cu gandurile noastre, cu cuvintele noastre si ceea ce ar trebui sa dureze 90 de secunde poate ajunge si pana la …20 de ani!
In completare Dr Jill Botle Taylor spune in cartea ei –
If, however, I remain angry after those 90 seconds have passed, then it is because I have chosen to let that circuit continue to run. Moment by moment, I make the choice to either hook into my neurocircuitry or move back into the present moment, allowing that reaction to melt away as fleeting physiology. The really exciting news about acknowledging my right and left characters is that I always have an alternative way of looking at any situation-is my glass half full or half empty? If you approach me with anger and frustration, then I make the choice to either reflect your anger and engage in argument (left brain), or be empathic and approach you with a compassionate heart (right brain). What most of us don’t realize is that we are unconsciously making choices about how we respond all the time. It is so easy to get caught up in the wiring of our pre-programmed reactivity (limbic system) that we live our lives cruising along on automatic pilot. I have learned that the more attention my higher cortical cells pay to what’s going on inside my limbic system, the more say I have about what I am thinking and feeling. By paying attention to the choices my automatic circuitry is making, I own my power and make more choices consciously. In the long run, I take responsibility for what I attract into my life.
When my brain runs loops that feel harshly judgmental, counter-productive, or out of control, I wait 90 seconds for the emotional/physiological response to dissipate and then I speak to my brain as though it is a group of children. I say with sincerity, “I appreciate your ability to think thoughts and feel emotions, but I am really not interested in thinking these thoughts or feeling these emotions anymore. Please stop bringing this stuff up.” Essentially, I am consciously asking my brain to stop hooking into specific thought patterns. Different people do it differently of course.
The secret to hooking into any of these peaceful states is the willingness to stop the cognitive loops of thought, worry, and any ideas that distract us from the kinesthetic and sensory experience of being in the here and now. Most important, however, our desire for peace must be stronger than our attachment to our misery, our ego, or our need to be right. I love that old saying, “Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?” Personally, I really like the way happy feels inside my body and therefore choose to hook into that circuitry on a regular basis. I’ve often wondered, If it’s a choice, then why would anyone choose anything other than happiness? I can only speculate, but my guess is that many of us simply do not realize that we have a choice and therefore don’t exercise our ability to choose. Before my stroke, I thought I was a product of my brain and had no idea that I had some say about how I responded to the emotions surging through me. On an intellectual level, I realized that I could monitor and shift my cognitive thoughts, but it never dawned on me that I had some say in how I perceived my emotions. No one told me that it only took 90 seconds for my biochemistry to capture, and then release me. What an enormous difference this awareness has made in how I live my life.
Dr Jill Botle Taylor face o lista cu 40 de lucruri pe care apropriatii celor care sufera un atac cerebral ar trebui sa le stie despre recuperarea prietenilor/ rudelor lor. Cum se vede recuperarea din partea cealalta, mai ales cand esti medic si intelegi toate procesele care ti se intampla.
Le las mai jos in print screen ca sa fie usor de dat mai departe, pentru ca asta este dorinta doctorului exprimata direct in carte. (atentie! dupa listele din carte, mai urmeaza doua observatii importante ale doamnei doctor:) )
Si doua observatii ale doamnei doctor de dupa recuperarea personala dupa atacul cerebral, observatii care o sa va faca sa va ganditi la oamenii din jurul vostru care au trecut prin situatii extreme de viata si …”au invatat sa nu mai puna la suflet” si “sa fie intelegatori si buni cu altii”.
For me, it’s really easy to be kind to others when I remember that none of us came into this world with a manual about how to get it all right. We are ultimately a product of our biology and environment. Consequently, I choose to be compassionate with others when I consider how much painful emotional baggage we are biologically programmed to carry around. I recognize that mistakes will be made, but this does not mean that I need to either victimize myself or take your actions and mistakes personally. Your stuff is your stuff, and my stuff is my stuff. Feeling deep inner peace and sharing kindness is always a choice for either of us. Forgiving others and forgiving myself is always a choice. Seeing this moment as a perfect moment is always a choice.
To experience pain may not be a choice, but to suffer is a cognitive decision. When children are ill, it is often more difficult for the child to handle parental grief than it is for the child to endure the illness. The same can be true for anyone who is ill. Please be very careful what circuits you stimulate when you visit someone who is not well. Death is a natural process we all must experience. Just realize that deep inside your right mind (deep within your heart’s consciousness) rests eternal peace. The easiest way I have found to humble myself back into a state of peaceful grace is through the act of gratitude. When I am simply grateful, life is simply great!